Giving a great blow job isn’t as hard as the hype surrounding it. Anyone can give a great blow job that will make it hard for your partner to think of much else for days after. Giving a bow job is a versatile sex act that can be done pretty much anywhere and all you need to know are some small, simple tricks…and a few toys to spice up the act never hurt anyone, either.
Be prepared with some sexy goods. Have the Blow Job Expert Kit ($49) on hand and you’ll find the edible gel, lickable oil, and accompanying vibrator will help transform you from a novice into an oral sex master. (Plus you save 25% when you purchase all the toys together!)
Study up. In addition to these blow job techniques, you’ll find great oral sex tips in the DVD Nina Hartley’s Guide to Better Fellatio, The Ultimate Guide to Fellatio ($14.95) book, and the Low Down on Going Down book.
Get comfortable. A blow job is much more fun without a sore neck. Find a position that works best for both of you, depending on where you are (you can’t really lounge comfortably in an elevator, you know) and the angle of the cock you’re dealing with (work with the natural downward angle of your throat). Kneel before your man with him standing if you’re in a confined area, or when you want to strike a pose that is really hot. Other positions: seat your partner and crouch between their legs (slide a pillow under your knees if you’re not on a soft surface), or lay down and let your partner thrust into your mouth, (harder to control the depth, but good for you lazy types). If you’re in a car, your partner can lay down lengthwise in the back.
If you’re using a condom, put it on now. Try a Trustex flavored condom (12 pack/$12) or Kiss O’ Mint condom (12 pack/$12) if you don’t like the taste of latex. A sexy way to set the scene is to use your mouth to put the condom on before you get busy.
Give us a kiss. If you’re dealing with a soft penis, you don’t have to wait until it’s hard to start the show. Put it in your mouth when it’s soft (or semi-hard) to get acquainted. Kiss it. Lick it. You can sweeten things up by applying an edible gel like Good Head Gel or Sliquid Green Apple ($14).
Mouth off. Slide your lips gently over your teeth for smooth sailing. Most fellatio recipients like lots of spit, but others prefer a drier job, so check in with your partner. Asking quick yes or no questions like “want it dryer?” or “more spit?” can be helpful and hot. Despite your amazing oral sex technique, you aren’t a mind-reader, so watch your partner for body language cues.
Experiment. You can do more wonderful stuff with your mouth than just suck (and remember–the harder you suck doesn’t necessarily mean the better it feels). Mix it up by licking the sensitive underside of the shaft, the nerve-ending-loaded head of the penis, and the testicles. Softly blow on the moistened areas. The combination of sensations will feel incredible.
Hands-on. Give your blow job a hand. Grip the cock around the base and slide it up and down, hand-job style, in tandem with your mouth. (Some folks like a tight squeeze, others may not, so check in.) This is great because you can cover a lot of the shaft this way without worrying about taking the whole cock in your mouth. You can concentrate on the super-sensitive head and suck as hard or softly as you and your partner like. Use lube for extra slipperiness. A silicone lube like Eros Bodyglide is great for blow jobs: it’s concentrated so you only need a tiny bit, it’s long-lasting so you won’t need to keep stopping to reload, and it doesn’t have a distracting taste or smell.
Deep throat. Deep-throating the act of taking the entire shaft into your mouth and throat can be cool, but you can give a perfectly stellar blow job without doing so. The key to deep throat is to relax your jaw and throat muscles as much as you can. Otherwise, you trigger the gag reflex.
Accessorize. Bring some toys into your routine. Experiment with cock rings, butt plugs, or mini vibrators (like the Finger Fun vibe) for some attention on the testicles and perineum. Hold a Pocket Rocket vibrator against your cheek to add vibrations to your mouth play. Or try sucking on ice or a breath mint ($5) to transmit a tingly sensation to your favorite penis. Again, check in with your partner to see how experimental you should be.
Get into it. Look at your partner and the ecstacy you have caused! Make eye contact. Show your partner how much you love being down there. Moan, make appreciative noises (a well-placed MMMM! can make for some nice vibration, too), let your partner know how turned on you are. Don’t neglect the rest of the body, either stroke, tickle, scratch the thighs, stomach, butt, and everywhere else you can reach.
Sucking Silicone. This applies to every cock: silicone, rubber, glass, vegetable and flesh alike. When you’re dealing with a dildo, treat it like your partner can feel everything you’re doing to it because they can. For more on this topic, see How to Suck Strap-on Cock.
Finish the Job. It is ultimately your choice whether or not to swallow. Your partner’s diet, health, habits and frequency of ejaculation will determine the quantity and taste of the ejaculate. The ejaculate of someone who ingests lots of red meat, caffeine, alcohol or cigarettes, may taste more intense than that of a non-smoking vegetarian. The most ejaculate you might encounter is a teaspoonful or so. You have several choices if you aren’t crazy about ejaculate, but don’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings:
- You can take it in your mouth and discreetly deposit into a nearby towel.
- As your partner approaches climax, withdraw and finish with your hand.
- You can let your partner come on your body and admire the copious amounts of ejaculate.
- You can use a condom.
When you’re totally focused on giving head, it can be a lot of fun whether it’s for power play (your partner’s most precious asset is at your mercy), intimacy, or the pure fun of getting someone off. Remember, you should only be performing fellatio on somebody if you’re really into it and are able to focus all of your energy on what you’re doing. If you’re staring at the clock, waiting for it to end, or worrying about the laundry in the dryer, you won’t have a good time and your partner will be able to tell you’re not into it, which can be distracting, too. Think of it this way–Do you want your partner to be going down on you and keep looking at the clock every five minutes?
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