Have you ever read a movie review that was a unique step away from the countless other reviews of the same movie out there; each sentence crafted just perfectly and every thought just flat-out snicker-inducing–and you haven’t even seen the movie being reviewed? Well, that is exactly how I feel after reading Elvis Mitchell’s review of The Roommate at Movieline.

I have yet to see the college-age thriller that opened this past weekend, but I have seen the trailers many times. I was mildly interested the first time I saw the trailer, only because it is a complete rip-off of Single White Female, which I love, and the premise never seems to get old; it has been done countless times.

Movieline gave The Roommate a score of 0.5 out of 10 and includes phenomenally hilarious thoughts, like:

“It’s the kind of live-action sub-mediocrity that usually comes with 3-D glasses. And the only fear this movie will inspire is when you realize the goggles being passed out at the ticket counter are for the far luckier patrons of Sanctum.”

“[T]his movie doesn’t scream anything, except that the cast was too young to ever have seen Single White Female or the dozens of ripoffs that have come in its wake — many of which were probably produced by the very studio that made this one.”

“In the theater where I saw it, the tedium was broken only by the sound of Angry Birds being played on iPhones.”

Apparently not a whole lot of people sought out reviews for this movie before heading out to the theater; that or they didn’t run across Movieline’s review or more people were willing to take their chances rather than wait until it hits Netflix. The Roommate topped box office charts, debuting at $15.6 million. Its biggest contender, Sanctum, raked in just $9.2 million.

The Roommate scored a B- rating from CinemaScore moviegoers and it drew a large female audience; 65% of its audience was female, in fact, and 61% were younger than 21.

The consensus is that The Roommate will plummet from here on out and Jezebel put it perfectly, saying that “women would rather watch women stalking each other than football.”